getting my second wind » real life

finding time to be grateful

laurel — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 06:00:46 +0000

The past week has been one of the most stressful times of my life – leaving in the middle of the night to collect my husband from a hospital in Illinois; driving back and blowing a tire in the middle of nowhere; spending money that was earmarked for something else to pay for four new tires; husband getting much, much sicker; stress driven trip to the emergency room; emergency surgery; four long days in the hospital and lots of family visits (from his side). Stressful.

Stressssful.

My plate was (and still is) full. I feel as if I can’t add one more iota of caring to it.

I find myself getting wrapped up in that feeling and (can we be honest) it makes me a short-tempered. Yet, I truthfully have much to be thankful for:

1. For a husband who is on the mend.

2. For amazing sisters-in-laws, who thought to look out for me.

3. For amazing, giving parents, who jumped in with no questions asked and made things easier for the husband and I. And who disinfected my whole house – not once but twice – to make it safe for the husband to come home. And who watched my dogs while I was away and spent hours with them, knowing how much I needed for them to be okay.

4. For having my husband at home. Finally.

5. For an understanding boss, who let me take whatever time I needed and hardly ever nagged about a major grant due less than a week away.

6. For a loving family who cared and who was there.

7. For a sister-in-law who filled the fridge with food that the husband could eat.

8. For a step-son and brother-in-law who helped husband up those damn stairs.

9. For workman’s comp, who will be paying for this huge mess.

10. for my husband – who held me when I freaked out and who is here to hold me at night.

I don’t know if my plate will get less full by remembering those things – I hope so. I hope it will make my plate a little bit bigger because I don’t like myself like this. I like myself much better when I find room to care about others, when I make room to put myself in other people’s shoes.

I like myself better when I can see beyond my own small circle.

A few tips for job seekers

laurel — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 02:10:46 +0000

So, recently (and thankfully), I placed a post for a new Development and Special Events Specialist. It’s basically a special events person with some regular development assistant stuff thrown in. It’s a great opportunity for both the person whom we will hire and for me. It’s been a long process to get to the hiring stage – and a long time was spent weeding through resumes and interviewing.

Over the last two weeks, I’ve received 3 resumes. The issue is that the application deadline was July 30th. Almost a month later, and I’m still getting resumes? Really? Come on folks. So, if you’re reading this and wanting to work for a nonprofit – I have a few tips for you:

Pay attention to the deadline. This is so critical in nonprofit work – especially in nonprofit fundraising. The date is there for a reason.
Spell my name correctly. This is especially true since my name is spelled correctly in the ad.
Use my name. I don’t know which is worse – spelling my name wrong or putting “To Whom It May Concern” (um, that would be me – the person who’s listed as the contact person) or “Dear Human Resources Manager” (who the f*** is that?)
Use the correct position name – and certainly don’t say “the position you advertised”. We currently have 3 ads posted and referring to the correct position is a good thing.
Read the directions. Please give me what I’m asking for. I know everyone says this, but in fundraising, it’s especially true. You need to meet the needs of a donor. If you can’t meet my needs, why would I believe that you could meet the needs of donors? As stated in the ad, incomplete applications will not be considered. ‘nuf said.
No phone calls actually means no phone calls.
Research the company the you’re trying to work for – my company has a website, Facebook page, LinkedIn profile, Guidestar, etc. Research me – I’m pretty easy to find as well. Find out what makes us tick and you’ll be better prepared to answer questions. And may I point out how important Guidestar is for figuring out what to put as a salary? If I only make $x and I’ll be your boss, the likelihood that you will make more than I is slim to none. If you need that high of a salary, please save my time and yours and don’t apply.
Use my name. Oh, wait, did I already say that? Well, it deserves repeating. Use my name!!!

And, yes, the person whom we hired did all of this.

Thank goodness.

hello, my friend

laurel — Sat, 11 Jun 2011 16:03:40 +0000

sometimes the hardest part is taking that first step … so this is that step. i make no promises about balancing my life, not working late at night, posting often, etc. I just promise to say “hello” every now and then.

welcome 2010

laurel — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 05:19:46 +0000

2009 – the year I figured out how to sew.

Let’s see – I finished 2 quilts, 10 bags, 1 skirt, 1 shirt, and 1 much-beloved jacket. And I’m starting the year with 2 quilts to finish (late Christmas gifts) and lots of plans.

I don’t normally “do” resolutions – but this year, I”m setting up goals. First, I”ve added a new page called WIP (Works in Progress) which is where I intend to put my projects as I start them – and hopefully as I complete them. I want to document this learning process and also to become a little more accountable. I also need to figure out a better work/personal balance. I’m a happier person and more productive when I do things outside of work that’s not more work. With all of that being said – here are my 2010 goals:

stop wasting so much time on my beloved Bejeweled Blitz, Mafia Wars and Facebook. Oh,how I’ll miss thee – but really, time is too precious.
work at home less than 3 nights a week and limit those work hours to less than 4 hours a night.
increase my organization in my office so that i can snatch snippets of time to work on projects.
find a tried and true (TNT) skirt pattern – I have high hopes that this one will be it. But if not, perhaps this one.
Make a dress to wear to work and out of work. I’m thinking perhaps this one (the one with the stand up collar) or this one.
make this jacket
make this shirt
make 4 new quilts – including one for dominic.
use my walking foot and quilt at least one of the quilts myself
make myself a new messenger bag

so, let’s get going on 2010!

ending 2009

laurel — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 03:52:07 +0000

It’s hard to believe that 2009 is over – and yet truthfully, I’m glad to see it go.

The year ended roughly for S & I. S’s dad was in an accident in Colorado and, after being brought back to KC, went into cardiac arrest on Christmas morning and passed away on the 27th. We had the memorial service on the 31st and I think I’m not the only one that feels like this has all been surreal. I think we’re all numb.

There’s a lot to be said about his dad and what he meant to us all. But what I will take with me was his incredible ability to like and to be liked by everyone he met. He could make anyone feel welcome and part of the family immediately upon meeting them. I know that he did that for me and that I will miss him dreadfully.

peace

laurel — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 16:24:23 +0000

Hm… well, it’s certainly what i’m looking for lately. But I don’t know if I would say that I’m a peaceful person – or at least that’s not how others would describe me.

Your Word is “Peace”

You see life as precious, and you wish everyone was safe, happy, and taken care of.

Social justice, human rights, and peace for all nations are all important to you.

While you can’t stop war, you try to be as calm and compassionate as possible in your everyday life.

You promote harmony and cooperation. You’re always willing to meet someone a little more than halfway.

What’s Your Word?

No, I haven’t forgotten

laurel — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 23:50:49 +0000

I know it’s a lame excuse – so we’ll just skip right over where I’ve been the past month and move into what I’ve done this week…

Randomness

1. eaten the same meal for dinner since Sunday. mind you not leftovers, just the same meal because i’m too lazy to think of something new to make and I have those ingredients on hand.

2. written 2 grants – total pages submitted 1,268 (yep – that’s not a typo)

3. started thinking about this quilt

which really is just code for I-looked-at-the-fabric-for-a-long-time-marveling-at-how-much-I-like-it-but-did-nothing-productive-with-it. And then thought about buying some new fabric – just ’cause

4. realized that July 10 is coming sooner then i think, so started this quilt late Monday night

forgot how many squares i needed- so i just kept cutting thinking that it’s big – it can handle it..

(Yes, I remembered how many and will be back to work on it tonight… i hope.)

5. finished the shirt I’ve been working on for … oh … ever - realized it’s too scratchy and needs some neck adjustments – so put in my WIP pile.

6. went to a training on why development people fail and realized that their idea of failure in no way met mine.

7. ate lots of raspberries lately – wished they were from the bushes I planted, but realized the birds probably liked them more than me… next year it will be a different story.

8. keep thinking that it’s the end of the month – even wrote that on a grant report today – it’s sad to have vacation-brain 3 weeks before you actually take a vacation.

So, i think that’s it… tonight, I’m celebrating that I finished all of my to-do’s today (mind you the grants were the biggest part of the to-dos) and while I have a huge list waiting for me tomorrow, I’m going to enjoy watching trash TV (So You Think You Can Dance? anyone?) and working on the quilt. And maybe, just maybe finishing the scratchy shirt.

Next sewing skill to learn – sewing with knits – nice, soft knits.

wow, really?

laurel — Sat, 02 May 2009 21:49:37 +0000

I can’t believe that it’s been more than 2 months since I last posted. good golly!

Let’s see what have I been doing? I’m sorry – life has just taken over here. For nonprofits and especially for their development directors, this year is a rough one. On the positive side, thanks to President Obama, we have some opportunities that are amazing and that we have a good chance of getting. But my organization has typically had strong support from banks, who as everyone knows are not doing so well. And individual donors, well, my family isn’t the only one that’s hurting. So, right now, as the development director, I don’t feel that I can let one opportunity pass us by. And that means long hours and little balance between life and work.

On Thursday, we just had our annual event and came in shy of our goal by about $3K. So, good – really, only a 3% drop over where I thought we’d be. But the work that it took to get to that point was incredible. But so is the need. Every day, I am seeing more and more people come to us for help with their rent, utilities, prescriptions, food, etc. People who never thought that they would need to turn to a charity for help and are having to do so now.

So, we’re still out there hitting the pavement, applying for both foundation and government grants, and working to make sure we hit all angles and every possibility. It is exhausting – to be honest. But I can’t stop – there is such a huge need and there is nothing worse than turning someone away because we don’t have the money and know that their children are going to lose their home. So, we keep plugging… and praying that this economy turns around.

okay – so back to last Thursday’s event – I actually found time to work on a chinese coin quilt and, thanks to one of my mother’s friends (Denise – the lifesaver) actually got it quilted and finished (thanks to Mom, the binding queen) in time to turn it in. Although, I have to admit it was a difficult decision to turn it in – I loved it.

I was a little bit worried because our auction people aren’t so into the handmade movement as I am. But I think the fact that there was a lot of white space (7 inches around each side) helped.

And I think the funkier fabrics than what many are used to seeing (love me some Amy Butler and Joel Dewberry) and the colors worked out really well. I will admit that it was a bear to make. I am pretty much a mostly solid quilt sort of gal and it was difficult for me to have some many patterns – actually I started with only 7, but at about 3/4 of the way through, I decided that I really needed more patterns – which that alone is weird for me to say. So, I”m pretty surprised by how much I loved it.

So, now I’m one down – 1 still to finish and 3 to start.

And you know what? I can’t wait!

change is visible everywhere

laurel — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 05:00:14 +0000

Love the fact that President Obama has a blog. Well, at least his administration does. Frankly, I love the whole thing – check out the newly revamped whitehouse.gov. It actually looks like an up-to-date website. pretty to look at, easy to ready, and a great informal feel (love the bio about Michelle Obama). I really like it.

I’m going on record that I truly believe that this administration can help engender real change and that the world we see today will be very different in 4 years:

Dr. King taught us that we could no longer view our own day-to-day cares and responsibilities as somehow separate from what was happening in the wider world that we read about in the newspaper and saw on TV. Because ultimately, for each of us, our own story and the American story are not separate, they are shared. And they are both strengthened and enriched each time we stand up and answer the call to help meet the challenges of our new century.

So today, I am asking you to roll up your sleeves and join in the work of remaking this nation. I pledge to you that government will do its part to open up more opportunities for citizens to participate. And in return, I ask you to play your part – to not just pitch in today, but to make an ongoing commitment that lasts far beyond one day, or even one presidency.

From President Obama’s Remarks at the Day of Service Luncheon at Coolidge High School

(And I’m going on record: Thank God for having a president who once again is an amazing orator and that the likelihood that he will ever say “misunderestimated” is nil.)

times are changing…

laurel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 01:53:53 +0000

i know – 2 posts in 2 days. wow, i’m setting myself up, huh?

I won’t even talk about how much i enjoyed Bill and Hillary’s speeches. Wow – did you see him? Seriously, 3 minutes of applause.

but for those of you bored with politics, we’ll move on to something else.

From etc.: This is a list of the top 106 books most often marked “unread” by LibraryThing users. The rules: bold the ones you’ve read, underline (or italicize) the ones you read for school, cross out the ones you started but didn’t finish.

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell

Anna Karenina

Crime and Punishment

Catch-22

One Hundred Years of Solitude

Wuthering Heights

The Silmarillion

Life of Pi : a novel

The Name of the Rose

Don Quixote

Moby Dick

Ulysses

Madame Bovary

The Odyssey

Pride and Prejudice

Jane Eyre

The Tale of Two Cities

The Brothers Karamazov

Guns, Germs, and Steel: the fates of human societies

War and Peace

Vanity Fair

The Time Traveler’s Wife

The Iliad

Emma

The Blind Assassin

The Kite Runner

Mrs. Dalloway

Great Expectations

American Gods

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius

Atlas Shrugged

Reading Lolita in Tehran : a memoir in books

Memoirs of a Geisha

Middlesex

Quicksilver

Wicked : the life and times of the wicked witch of the West

The Canterbury Tales

The Historian : a novel

A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

Love in the Time of Cholera

Brave New World

The Fountainhead

Foucault’s Pendulum

Middlemarch

Frankenstein

The Count of Monte Cristo

Dracula

A Clockwork Orange

Anansi Boys

The Once and Future King

The Grapes of Wrath

The Poisonwood Bible : a novel

1984

Angels & Demons

The Inferno (and Purgatory and Paradise)

The Satanic Verses

Sense and Sensibility

The Picture of Dorian Gray

Mansfield Park

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

To the Lighthouse

Tess of the D’Urbervilles

Oliver Twist

Gulliver’s Travels

Les Misérables

The Corrections

The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time

Dune

The Prince

The Sound and the Fury

Angela’s Ashes : a memoir

The God of Small Things

A People’s History of the United States : 1492-present

Cryptonomicon

Neverwhere

A Confederacy of Dunces

A Short History of Nearly Everything

Dubliners

The Unbearable Lightness of Being

Beloved

Slaughterhouse-five

The Scarlet Letter

Eats, Shoots & Leaves

The Mists of Avalon

Oryx and Crake : a novel

Collapse : how societies choose to fail or succeed

Cloud Atlas

The Confusion

Lolita

Persuasion

Northanger Abbey

The Catcher in the Rye

On the Road

The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Freakonomics : a rogue economist explores the hidden side of everything

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance : an inquiry into values

The Aeneid

Watership Down

Gravity’s Rainbow

The Hobbit

In Cold Blood : a true account of a multiple murder and its consequences

White Teeth

Treasure Island

David Copperfield

The Three Musketeers

Really, i never realized how many of these books I started but never finished.

i think i should read more…